Don't Deny It
by Sassy Kames
Summary: For JamesxKendallxKames3! Hope you like it dear. X3


**A/N **This is for JamesxKendallxKames3 who wanted a one shot where Kendall is in love with James but is too stubborn to admit it but James knows this and forces him to tell him. I'm hoping that this is fine enough to fit the description, lol. By the way, you are SO cute, dear! XD

Hope you like it!

p.s this was supposed to be angst (which I hope it is DX) but it also has humor. :3

p.p.s I AM DONE DOING REQUESTS AT THE MOMENT, SO DON'T SEND ME ANYMORE PEOPLE. thank you. I still love you all. c:

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**Don't Deny It**

"I know,"

"Know what?"

"Know that you love me." he smirked while advancing on me, making me walk backwards until my back hit out bedroom wall.

I scoff and make my face go blank, like I don't care what he's talking about nor do I give a flying fuck. But on inside I'm running around screaming and sobbing and there's a huge fire storm, balls of fire exploding aggresively in the air, on the ground, and at me.

Which means I'm dead. I died. Like, how the hell does he even know? I'm sure I kept it well hidden.

**Well, not well hidden enough, genius.**

_Brain/mind/conscious/whatever the fuck you are, please go away. You're not helping my situation here. _

Now, back to my 'situation'...

"James, you think everyone loves you." I snort and cross my arms over my chest. I'm hoping that my body is giving off the vibe 'I don't give a damn shit that you just trapped me against the wall between your sexy arms that look hard and firm and I want to feel them but won't because I have what they call 'dignity', since James indeed had me against the wall of our shared room, his muscled arms on either side of my head.

He smirked and cocked his cocky head to the side. "I don't think that. I know that. And besides the fact that everyone _does _love me, doesn't mean that they're _in _love with me. But you are."

What a cocky Mr. know it all bastard that is correct. There's no way in hell I'm telling him though. I mean, he already knows but I don't need to confirm it and make his already overfull head with cockiness even more full with cockyness. And smug. Cause he's a smug bastard, too.

"I am not," I glare at him, staring into his amused twinkling hazel eyes, "I don't know where you got that from but you need to shut up and get a reality check, because I. Don't. Love you." with that said, I try to walk forward but I get shoved back by James. I'm about to shove him back but he catches my raised arms, pins them to the wall, and then pins _me _to the wall with his body.

His fine, _fine _body that was equipped with a delicious, hard and toned eight pack, huge, but not too huge, firm pectorals that were a golden tan under his tight black v-neck shirt, arms bulging from shoulder to wrist with firm muscles, especially his biceps... his-

**And you say you have dignity.**

_Excuse me?_

**Obviously you don't if you're going to drone on and on about his body.**

Choosing not to answer, (because the voice was right...), I glared at James. "Let me go."

"Nope. Not until you admit that you love me."

I open my mouth to retort but he shakes his head with a smirk. "Come on Kendall. You honestly think I don't notice your lingering looks? The way you stare at me when I get out the shower, all wet and appeasing to you. The way the water droplets trickle down my body gets your mouth dry and your eyes big as they stare without a care in the world."

I'm gawking at this- this- this bastard! This stupid, attractive, narcissistic bastard! I do not do _any _of those things he claims that I do. _None _of them.

**Quit lying to yourself. **

_GO. AWAY._

Shaking my head, I seethe at my smirking band mate. "You've got it twisted up, Diamond," I growl but before I can continue, James' mouth brushes over mine, his soft lips teasing mine, and his devious tongue very lightly slipping inside the parted gap between my lips.

"No," he whispers, staring straight into my wide eyes. "I don't."

I'm swallowing hard, and breathing hard, and thinking hard and- am I growing hard?

Yes. Yes, I am. 'Cause that's what I fucking needed at this moment. As long as James doesn't get too close-

"Ah, and little Kendall Jr. agrees with me," James had moved our lower body parts together and was slowly circling his hips with mine, making me gasp. "I don't have anything 'twisted', _Knight_. I'm perfectly fine. It's you who's not, though."

"What the fuck is that supposed to mean?" I growl, pleased that my voice didn't quake or tremble. Much.

"It means why are you denying you wanting me? You loving me? I know you do both; you do want me and you _do _love me. Don't deny it."

I'm glaring down at the floor, refusing to meet his eyes while gritting my teeth. I'm praying that my face isn't showing anything, not even the smallest glimpse from behind its hard mask even though inside, I'm holding in a scream, a sob, just everything.

I may seem dramatic at the moment, but I have my reasons. Them being for one, I'm in love with James Diamond. That brings me to reason number two. He's my best friend. Of 11 years. You can't love your best friend, a GUY who you've been best friends with for over a decade. All our years of a strong, loving, compassionate friendship canNOT get ripped away from me due to my selfish motives. Meaning that I want James more than a friend but that can't happen.

Which brings me to reason number three. Rejection. It would hurt. It would hurt so much because I want him so bad. I don't want to keep seeing him prancing around with girls who think just underwear is the right amount of clothing everywhere I look and go.

But I also don't want to lose him as my best friend. My brother. Well, on the outside and to the world he's my brother, but on the inside and in MY little world, he's more than that to me. Way more. It's just hard and I don't want to admit that I am in love with him because that just confirms everything and I...

I just can't lose him. I can't and I won't. Besides he doesn't even reciprocate my feelings. I'd just be tossing years worth of an amazing friendship away and I just won't allow that. I won't.

**Just a few moments ago, he practically kissed you. Straight dudes don't kiss other dudes. They just don't. So maybe he does feel the same way about you.**

_That's complete bull. Obviously he's fucking with me, trying to make me cave or do something stupid. I don't know! But he does NOT love me. Maybe as a little brother but not love love._

**You don't know that.**

_Oh, but I do._

**Because you're Kendall Knight, the boy who **_**obviously **_**knows **_**everything**_**, right?**

_I'm in no mood for sarcasm. Quit it._

**I'm merely speaking the truth. You don't know whether or not James loves you. You won't ever know if you don't admit your love for him and talk it out-**

_Okay, dudes don't TALK things over. Actually, real MEN don't talk ANY thing over._

**If you're implying that you are a 'man', a 'real' one at that, I laugh. Because you are not a 'real man', you are what folks call a coward. Running from your problems and not talking them over. You're already concluding that the results with this entire situation is going to be awful. Bad. But you don't know that. Not until you talk with James.**

_I don't want to talk to him when I already know that I'm going to either have a broken heart or fucked up relationship. Matter of fact, I bet I'm going to have BOTH. So what's to discuss?_

**Sigh. I tried. By the way, Sir Narcissistic is talking to you.**

Assuming that was James, I came back down to earth to see him waving his hand back and forth in front of my face. "Kendall... earth to Kendall... dude, where'd you go?" he was saying and I roll my eyes.

"I'm right here, stop that." it surprises me, my voice. It's all of a sudden crack y and soft with emotion.

James picks it up and drops the cockiness and smug attitude in an instant. My eyes widen when he grasps the sides of my face with his two warm hands and looks at me with concern. "Are you okay?"

My hands are moving to his chest so I can shove him away and there's a sarcastic, sharp reply on my tongue but I stop and think about his question.

Am I okay?

I would like to say that I am but then I'd be lying. I'm in love with my best friend who seems to enjoy that, or maybe it's just fucking with me that he enjoys. Not in the way that I want him to, of course. But like, does he even like me? The voice was right when it said that James kissed me, even though it was very very lightly. But that could be him just, once again, fucking with me. I don't want that. I don't want him to lead me on and I most definitely don't want him to reject me.

What I do want is him. But... arg. This is so fucking complicated...

I was jolted back down to earth again when a pair of lips were molding with mine. My eyes, that had close without me realizing it, shot open and I was met with dark hazel eyes. James pulled away, leaving me gaping like a fish.

"Wh-what was that?!" I yell once I can use words properly again.

He doesn't look bothered by my outburst. "A kiss."

"What for?!" I continue to yell. He rolls his eyes.

"Maybe because I like you?" his face turns serious and he grasps my face again gently. "Maybe because I love you?"

**What did I tell you.**

_SHUT UP!_

I'm staring wide eyed at James right now. With my mouth most likely hanging open. I just can't comprehend, like... wha? He loves me? No, he's just fucking with me. Like he always does when it comes to my emotions.

"That's a lie." I mutter and he's staring at me with wide eyes now.

"Excuse me?" he demands, dropping his hands down from my face to prop them back against the wall, caging me in. Again.

"You heard me!" I spit. "Look James, if you can't be man enough to tell me the truth-"

"But I did tell you the truth," he growls. "And what about you? Huh?"

"What about me?"

"I know you love me, why can't you just admit it? Quit denying everything-"

"I'm not denying anything!" wow, I really should stop lying. "I don't love you, I'm not in love with you, I- hey!"

James wrapped his arms around my waist and had hoisted me up in the air. My knees were bent on either side of his hips as he strode over to his bed and dropped me on it. I bounced unhappily with a racing heart.

Why? Because James just crawled on top of me, pinning me down on his bed with his body. My mouth is open to say something, I don't know yet, but James doesn't even give me the chance to utter one word by pressing his lips to mine, kissing me hard and passionately.

My head is spinning and I think I just let out a moan... not sure, because I'm not really paying any attention to anything except James' hot mouth and his wet tongue that was working its way past my parted lips and into my mouth.

"Oh~," yeah, that was a moan. I'd be embarrassed but James is now fucking _rolling _his hips into mine and he's french kissing me and I'm enjoying every damn second of it. "J-James," I whimper and he's pulling away from my swollen mouth to give my neck, which is very sensitive by the way, some pleasurable attention.

"I love you, Kendall. Why is this so hard to get?" he mumbles against my neck before sinking his teeth into it. Did I just fucking squeal?

"Why can't you understand that I want you?" James continues. He's licking my neck now and I'm moaning and fuck, his hip thrusts were making me slide up and down his bed.

**Pay attention to what he's saying.**

_Do you even know what I'm going through right now? I can't form words in the state I'm in; not when he's grinding on me like this. Go the fuck away._

But I do start to pay attention. Not because the dumb voice told me to though.

"Kendall," James leans up to stare down at me, his hazel pools dark. "Say something."

"Something," I croak and he kisses me.

"Not what I mean, wise ass." his teeth collect my lower lip, gently nipping on it before drawing it into his mouth and sucking on it.

"I-I do love you," I say, my voice sounding fucking _shy _and soft. James pulls back to stare at me again and I close my eyes waiting for some smart ass reply. It never comes though. Instead, I'm being pulled up into strong arms and a lap. My arms (on their own accord) move to loop around James' neck and I pull myself closer to his warm body.

"Why was that so hard to say?" he murmurs against my hair. His arms are tightly wrapped around my waist and I'm holding him close and am basking in this moment in time.

**Cheesy much?**

I ignore the voice and bury my face into James' shoulder. "It was very hard, Jamie," I mumble. "I love you so much but it would have killed me if you rejected me. I would have killed myself if you told me you never wanted to be friends anymore. I'd rather you and I being best friends, brothers than being in a relationship that you might've not even wanted. You still might not want it."

"I want it, Kendall." he tells me and I look up from his shoulder to stare at him.

"Do you really?" my voice is small.

"I do." he gently wipes under my eyes and I think that's weird until I realize that I'm fucking crying. Not a lot but a lot to make my dignity disappear into oblivion. Like, really. Why am I crying. I'm like a fucking girl... grr.

"Do you love me, James?"

"I do," he whispers, covering my face with soft, gentle kisses.

My eyes close and I grasp his face before bringing us together into a kiss. The kiss was full of emotion between the both of us. Love, passion, sadness, lust. As we're kissing, I readjust myself so that my legs are outstretched behind James and I'm sitting more into his lap. His arms around my waist tighten and he's suddenly pushing me back until I'm laying down, my back to his soft mattress.

He's moving on top of me again, whispering something I'm not understanding. My mind is blank and James is sucking on my neck and he's thrusting down hard on me again, making me whine. Then his hot mouth is by my ear and I can finally hear what he's saying.

_"Let me love you, let me love you, please. I need you, Kendall. Let me, baby. I love you so much." _he nibbles on my lobe and I'm shaking and nodding and whispering back, _yes yes yes yes _over and over again.

It's a blur from there on. I'm not sure how my clothes disappear from my body, but I find myself suddenly stripped to the bone underneath James who was also nude. Through my hazy state, I don't care. And James is gorgeous naked.

He should be naked more often.

He prepares me with his tongue and fingers. I'm whimpering and mewling and making about every other noise my mouth comes up with. The feel of his velvet tongue inside me is beyond pleasurable. It's amazing and erotic and I love it.

Then his fingers are inside me, two digits gently brushing against my sweet spot, making me see stars. He add two more, thrusting them in and out of my hole until I'm nice and open for him. When he removes his fingers, my heart is pounding loudly in my chest, for I know what's happening next.

James presses his mouth to mine while reaching over to his bedside table and opens the drawers, rummaging in it for a minute. He pulls away from me and I groan before attaching my lips under his chin. He's moaning and pushing me away gently. It's so that he can lube himself up with the small bottle he'd grabbed. He has a condom too and rips it open before rolling it on his impressive member.

Once that's all done, he stares at me with a smile and it's one of _those _smiles that calms me down instantly yet makes my heart do a bazillion flips. I smile back and he leans down to kiss me while pressing the tip of his dick inside me. It doesn't hurt and I don't make any sounds so he presses on, the whole head inside of me now.

That doesn't hurt either, just a little sting. I can tell that he's being cautious of not hurting me but I'm not a fragile porcelain doll. I wrap my legs around his waist and gently yank him forward more. He slides in further in me and I grit my teeth. Okay, maybe not my best move but I don't care.

He's halfway in me when the real pain hits me.

"G-god, you're so big," I wheeze between labored breathing when he's all the way in me. Okay, maybe I am like a porcelain doll.

His face is invisible by my neck but I can feel him smile against it. I can also feel him trembling and it takes me a second to get that he's trying to go, trying to hold back for my sake. I tilt his face up and kiss him sweetly. "You can go."

"Are you sure?" he asks and I smile, kissing him again.

"I'm sure, baby."

He smiles and kisses me deeply while slowly moving his hips back before snapping them forward. My back arches off the bed and I moan when he hits my prostate. It's a blur, my vision, my mind, my everything. James was inside me moving hard, soft, fast, slow, wet, deep. I'm moaning, he's moaning, we're both moaning and then I'm crying, like the big baby that I am.

But I've wanted this for so long, to have James loving me and making love to me. I really never knew it would come true but it did. It has. It's happening right now and I'm turning into a girl on her period, full of fucking emotions. I can't seem to mind right now though, because James is speeding up his thrusts and now I'm practically sobbing and on the verge of blacking out.

Maybe I do blackout because a huge wall of pleasure just took over my body and I felt a tingling sensation in my lower regions.

**Your orgasm, genius.**

_You know, I really don't want to talk to you right now when I'm in the middle of something like this._

I come back to it when a warm breath is ghosting over my face and lips are kissing everywhere on my face. "Oh god baby, wake up." James is murmuring against my flushed face and I open my eyes. Immediately ours lock together and then he's kissing me hard and deep and ugh, I'm mewling again.

I wrap my arms around his neck and pull him closer and tighter to me. He's shaking so hard and I'm trying to comfort him the best that I can. "Why're you trembling, Jamie?" I ask, kissing the corner of his mouth.

"I'm not," he whispers and holds me close. "It's you who's shaking."

And then I realize that he's right. I'm the one shaking so hard and fast and I don't know why. "Oh," I say and giggle. I don't know why, but I did and it made James smile so it was okay.

"Are you alright?" he asks and I nod, nuzzling my face into his shoulder.

"I love you."

"Even though you denied it?"

"Can't you just tell me you love me back?"

He laughs and pulls me in more closer to his naked chest. "I love you, too."

After that, we both fall asleep, me flushed against James, both of our chests smooshed together and my arms curled in the middle. I'm in content and happy and relieved and just about every other good feeling out in the world. Why? Because James _does _love me-

**Once again, I told you so.**

_Wow, thanks for ruining my speech moment._

**Well, I had to. It was going to go on forever.**

_That's normally what speeches do._

**Why can't you just go to sleep like you said you did.**

Ugh. Just know that I'm a happy guy right now, being in the arms of someone I love so much and didn't lose like I thought I would.

**But I did.**

And now I'm going to sleep.


End file.
